Comments for Heather Acton - Letting It All Hang Out http://www.heatheracton.com Stories of a mommy, Web geekette, and entrepreneur Fri, 12 Mar 2010 11:01:46 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 Comment on I Never Knew Motherhood Would Be Filled With This Much Guilt by heatheracton http://www.heatheracton.com/motherhood-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-121 heatheracton Fri, 12 Mar 2010 11:01:46 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=335#comment-121 I'm glad I am not the only one! =) I'm glad I am not the only one! =)

]]> Comment on I Never Knew Motherhood Would Be Filled With This Much Guilt by adventureswithmykids http://www.heatheracton.com/motherhood-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-119 adventureswithmykids Fri, 12 Mar 2010 09:18:19 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=335#comment-119 I chuckled when I read this post. I am right there with you! I chuckled when I read this post. I am right there with you!

]]> Comment on I Never Knew Motherhood Would Be Filled With This Much Guilt by adventureswithmykids http://www.heatheracton.com/motherhood-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-120 adventureswithmykids Fri, 12 Mar 2010 09:11:28 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=335#comment-120 I completely agree with you! I could very easily say "ditto" to the entire post. Right there with you. Right there with you. I completely agree with you! I could very easily say “ditto” to the entire post. Right there with you. Right there with you.

]]> Comment on Envision Lake County – Coworking With a Cause by Chuck Reynolds http://www.heatheracton.com/envision-lake-county-coworking-with-a-cause/comment-page-1/#comment-117 Chuck Reynolds Wed, 10 Mar 2010 04:50:55 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=359#comment-117 Like I said it's the idea and the actual collaboration and it's cool to see GPHQ spreading :) Like I said it's the idea and the actual collaboration and it's cool to see GPHQ spreading :)

]]> Comment on Envision Lake County – Coworking With a Cause by Chuck Reynolds http://www.heatheracton.com/envision-lake-county-coworking-with-a-cause/comment-page-1/#comment-114 Chuck Reynolds Tue, 09 Mar 2010 22:50:55 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=359#comment-114 Like I said it's the idea and the actual collaboration and it's cool to see GPHQ spreading :) Like I said it's the idea and the actual collaboration and it's cool to see GPHQ spreading :)

]]> Comment on I Never Knew Motherhood Would Be Filled With This Much Guilt by Marty Bhatia http://www.heatheracton.com/motherhood-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-118 Marty Bhatia Sat, 06 Mar 2010 18:17:56 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=335#comment-118 Although I am not a parent, I am a blogger, entrepreneur, and a man who has felt like I lived on the guilt bus my whole life. I recently had a major life change that was difficult, but the breakdown lead to a very clear view of the amount of guilt I feel. <br><br>I discovered that in a moment of clarity that my guilt came from my perception of time. Considering we are bloggers and are in 2010, we are accustom to instant gratification. That instant gratification is impossible to achieve all the time, and when I fail I feel guilty.<br><br>My new exercise is adding buffers of time in the forms of agreements with those closest to me. For one I no longer return phone calls immediately. The agreement can be that for 20 minutes everyday you get to sit in peace and quiet undisturbed. Let all of the thoughts you have in that 20 minutes arrive, say hello, and pass, until you get close to or to a quiet mind.<br><br>It has been very beneficial for me, and has helped clear the guilt that I was constantly feeling.<br><br>I hope that helps, and good blogging.<br><br>Marty Although I am not a parent, I am a blogger, entrepreneur, and a man who has felt like I lived on the guilt bus my whole life. I recently had a major life change that was difficult, but the breakdown lead to a very clear view of the amount of guilt I feel.

I discovered that in a moment of clarity that my guilt came from my perception of time. Considering we are bloggers and are in 2010, we are accustom to instant gratification. That instant gratification is impossible to achieve all the time, and when I fail I feel guilty.

My new exercise is adding buffers of time in the forms of agreements with those closest to me. For one I no longer return phone calls immediately. The agreement can be that for 20 minutes everyday you get to sit in peace and quiet undisturbed. Let all of the thoughts you have in that 20 minutes arrive, say hello, and pass, until you get close to or to a quiet mind.

It has been very beneficial for me, and has helped clear the guilt that I was constantly feeling.

I hope that helps, and good blogging.

Marty

]]> Comment on I Never Knew Motherhood Would Be Filled With This Much Guilt by Marty Bhatia http://www.heatheracton.com/motherhood-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-113 Marty Bhatia Sat, 06 Mar 2010 12:17:56 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=335#comment-113 Although I am not a parent, I am a blogger, entrepreneur, and a man who has felt like I lived on the guilt bus my whole life. I recently had a major life change that was difficult, but the breakdown lead to a very clear view of the amount of guilt I feel. <br><br>I discovered that in a moment of clarity that my guilt came from my perception of time. Considering we are bloggers and are in 2010, we are accustom to instant gratification. That instant gratification is impossible to achieve all the time, and when I fail I feel guilty.<br><br>My new exercise is adding buffers of time in the forms of agreements with those closest to me. For one I no longer return phone calls immediately. The agreement can be that for 20 minutes everyday you get to sit in peace and quiet undisturbed. Let all of the thoughts you have in that 20 minutes arrive, say hello, and pass, until you get close to or to a quiet mind.<br><br>It has been very beneficial for me, and has helped clear the guilt that I was constantly feeling.<br><br>I hope that helps, and good blogging.<br><br>Marty Although I am not a parent, I am a blogger, entrepreneur, and a man who has felt like I lived on the guilt bus my whole life. I recently had a major life change that was difficult, but the breakdown lead to a very clear view of the amount of guilt I feel.

I discovered that in a moment of clarity that my guilt came from my perception of time. Considering we are bloggers and are in 2010, we are accustom to instant gratification. That instant gratification is impossible to achieve all the time, and when I fail I feel guilty.

My new exercise is adding buffers of time in the forms of agreements with those closest to me. For one I no longer return phone calls immediately. The agreement can be that for 20 minutes everyday you get to sit in peace and quiet undisturbed. Let all of the thoughts you have in that 20 minutes arrive, say hello, and pass, until you get close to or to a quiet mind.

It has been very beneficial for me, and has helped clear the guilt that I was constantly feeling.

I hope that helps, and good blogging.

Marty

]]> Comment on I Never Knew Motherhood Would Be Filled With This Much Guilt by Heather Suchy Acton http://www.heatheracton.com/motherhood-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-112 Heather Suchy Acton Fri, 05 Mar 2010 11:47:45 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=335#comment-112 It's funny that we do still tend to generalize as moms being the primary caretakers of the kids, but it is true - more and more dads are taking on that role, or at the very least are extremely involved in the kids' lives if they are the working member of the family.<br><br>I do feel lucky that our kids are very attached to both Mike & me, but still Mike is away from the home 50 hrs/week that I am here. When it hits 4 days and I haven't been away from the kids & home, I get pretty antsy and overall feel very stifled. I am not a homebody and am overall very independent - my kids challenge both of those qualities (that run strong) in me. Even if I get a night or two out per week, I still get PLENTY of quality time with the kiddies - no worries there =)<br><br>Thanks for your input, Chris - I don't think you offended a soul =) It's funny that we do still tend to generalize as moms being the primary caretakers of the kids, but it is true – more and more dads are taking on that role, or at the very least are extremely involved in the kids' lives if they are the working member of the family.

I do feel lucky that our kids are very attached to both Mike & me, but still Mike is away from the home 50 hrs/week that I am here. When it hits 4 days and I haven't been away from the kids & home, I get pretty antsy and overall feel very stifled. I am not a homebody and am overall very independent – my kids challenge both of those qualities (that run strong) in me. Even if I get a night or two out per week, I still get PLENTY of quality time with the kiddies – no worries there =)

Thanks for your input, Chris – I don't think you offended a soul =)

]]> Comment on I Never Knew Motherhood Would Be Filled With This Much Guilt by Chris http://www.heatheracton.com/motherhood-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-111 Chris Fri, 05 Mar 2010 11:30:00 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=335#comment-111 Well...I think you generalized a little too much with your last statement (the "men do not feel this way" and not the "it is such a weird thing"). It might be true that a lot of men don't feel that way (even if they did they won't admit it since others might perceived that as being weak/feminine) but I can tell you for a fact that some men do feel that way...I do almost all the time. I decline invitations to see ballgames because of it. I guess some people might think I'm "weak/feminie" but I don't care...I know that my kids are only going to be that age once and that's it. I'm not going to miss it if I can.<br><br>Now, I'm not saying that having "me" time is bad or selfish but when your kids are super attached to your partner and aren't the slightest bit attached to you then you might want to re-evaluate your priorities (both parents - not just the mom). Having said that I don't think Heather has anything to worry about, though. How do I know? Just by reading all the posts/tweets she has about her kids is enough to tell me that she spends a good deal of time "entertaining" her kids. <br><br>Oh, I didn't write this to offend anyone...just wanted to clarify that some guys do have these guilty feelings too! :) Well…I think you generalized a little too much with your last statement (the “men do not feel this way” and not the “it is such a weird thing”). It might be true that a lot of men don't feel that way (even if they did they won't admit it since others might perceived that as being weak/feminine) but I can tell you for a fact that some men do feel that way…I do almost all the time. I decline invitations to see ballgames because of it. I guess some people might think I'm “weak/feminie” but I don't care…I know that my kids are only going to be that age once and that's it. I'm not going to miss it if I can.

Now, I'm not saying that having “me” time is bad or selfish but when your kids are super attached to your partner and aren't the slightest bit attached to you then you might want to re-evaluate your priorities (both parents – not just the mom). Having said that I don't think Heather has anything to worry about, though. How do I know? Just by reading all the posts/tweets she has about her kids is enough to tell me that she spends a good deal of time “entertaining” her kids.

Oh, I didn't write this to offend anyone…just wanted to clarify that some guys do have these guilty feelings too! :)

]]> Comment on I Never Knew Motherhood Would Be Filled With This Much Guilt by BobbiJanay http://www.heatheracton.com/motherhood-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-110 BobbiJanay Thu, 04 Mar 2010 10:10:29 +0000 http://www.heatheracton.com/?p=335#comment-110 I forgot to add it wasn't a waste of money think of all the new friendships that are forming from that trip. I forgot to add it wasn't a waste of money think of all the new friendships that are forming from that trip.

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